bip_bebop

Emma is a saint/my hero.

That is all~

/quote from Kim Possible on the telly behind me

I'm going back to school starting 8 in the morning today. What can I say? I am not thrilled. I'm looking forward to photojournalism, but all else is promising to be all-consuming. My Japanese is entirely rusty, and 201 is supposedly the hardest section to complete, so I have to whip myself into shape right quick or else be lost in the course. I haven't used anything past basic math since my freshman year, so algebra will be hellish. Not to mention, my damn school just can't give me a smooth transition from break to semester for ANYTHING, so instead of acknowledging the fact that I've been signed up for history class since the beginning of summer, they just now kick me out of my classes for nonpayment. I managed to get most of it cleared up--apparently my Fafsa wasn't turned in--EXCEPT for history, and all the classes are closed except ones I can't take due to lack of prerequisites. So I'm going in the morning to three classes as opposed to four, meaning I have like...four hours of free time in between taking classes.

...and now that I look to see what my exact schedule is, I can't access the stupid website because it closes at 11, which is the dumbest fuckin thing I've ever heard for a WEBSITE to do, and doesn't open again until my first class starts. So I'm going in with no idea where I have to be. Fan-fucking tastic.

I'm in a bad mood.

It's been a year today since I last saw Amy.
I want her back. So, so bad. I can't even express it. I know it seems dumb to a lot of people to go on about pets the way most people go on about people, but...I really, really loved that dog. This year has been really stupid and empty without her, even though we have a dew dog, Dori, who is precious and I think is the only dog my mom could've brought home without me hating her for it. I can't think about this. I'm crying already because I'm stupid and nostalgic like that, and I'm so damn tired of this school making me regret not going to my first college pick instead, and I have no sweet creature to comfort me like Amy did. Artemis (one of my cats) does seem to follow me around a lot nowadays and always comes up to me if I cry, and I love him for it, but that doesn't change that I lost someone really close to me and can never get her back.

It's my mom's birthday today. I haven't been able to get her anything. I feel like a douchebag.

I'm tired of not knowing what I want to do. In life, I mean. Well...in the career world, I mean. I'm technically a senior in college with no major and no credits towards any sort of major at all. I've managed to pick classes so bloody all over-the-place that they have nothing to do with each other and therefore I have nothing that even points to anything specific I could work towards. How I managed that is really kind of impressive in a dumb way. I think after this semester I'm going to be forced to pick something...but there's just...nothing that interests me enough. I'm still clinging to the idea that something exciting is going to happen to me, I guess. I should really get over that.

THIS SONG IS ABOUT MEEEEEEE